I was the baby of the family with an older sister and brother until I was five years old. I became a big sister when Michele was born on October 2. I remember my mother holding her in the front seat of the car as we drove to our home in Long Island. (Seatbelts were not a thing in the 70’s!) As I stared at this little bundle whose name I couldn’t pronounce, I had no idea of the joy and laughter she would bring into my life.

Do you know how someone is stuck at a particular age and you picture them in a certain way? For me, Michele was always 8 years old with short, straight, shiny black hair, and a cute smile.

As we grew into teens, everyone thought we were twins. The same laugh, shape of face, and if I may say—bubbly personality.

When Nick was born, he looked more like Michele than me. Everyone mistook him for hers. That was fine by me as she and her husband, Rich, are Nick’s Godparents.

Having our children around the same age changed my perspective of seeing her as an 8-year-old and solidified us as best friends.  

Never would I have known at 5-years-old why this baby became a part of my life. She’s my oar and compass who has helped me navigate my greatest loss and one that she felt to the core of her being.

Losing a child is the most devastating loss I have ever known. I also want to acknowledge the heavy weight of grief that family members bear. Aunts and uncles, cousins, grandparents, friends, and siblings lose a part of their family, their life.

I’m grateful to have my baby sister’s birthday in October as it brightens my days and gives me a reason to celebrate.

Happy Birthday to my baby sister!