Names—Part of your Family Stories
Photo by Pedrosala on Canva
Our names are often the first thing someone knows about us. How we claim our name–prefix, given, middle, surname, maiden name, suffix. How we introduce ourselves–full name, shortened, nickname, formal or informal. It says so much about who we are and perhaps who we are becoming.
Names can be chosen from family tradition, baby books, pop culture, favorite movies/books, or best friends. So many ways!
Very often they are chosen based on their meanings–qualities or virtues that parents hope their child will embody.
According to Psychology Today, names might:
show that people hold stereotypes about others based on their name,
reveal cultural values and shifts,
influence our personality.
Your name holds many stories. From a journaling aspect, knowing those stories or meanings are about self-awareness. It’s about searching within and deciding whether these are stories you want to keep and/or rewrite.
See how these prompts resonate with you and what stories they bring up for you:
Start with writing down your full name as you are right now.
What do your names mean?
Who gave those names to you?
Why?
What are the stories of your name?
How has your name impacted you?
Does it get misspelled or mispronounced?
Are there assumptions about your gender or abilities?
Does your name carry the weight of family expectations and responsibilities?
How do you feel about that? Excited or weighed down? Could be both!
How have your names and the stories behind them shaped you?
For me, there are multiple ways to spell Janine and I’m often called Denise! I have no idea why.
I wonder where the French name came from in a family with strong Greek and Italian names.
My middle name is shortened from my paternal grandmother.
I chose my confirmation name from my godmother who was very similar to me in height, looks, and personality.
My middle names come from strong, amazing women. I hope I live up to their names. (Oh, is that a story that I’ve claimed? Does it still serve me?) Will have to ponder that one.
I chose my husband’s last name and joked that I married him because of it! But when I began to publish my books, I added my maiden name. Not as a hyphenation but as who I am. A reclaiming of all that had brought me to that first moment of publication.
If I were to write the stories of my names and how they shaped me, some of the threads I might unravel would be:
Growing up with my best friend of the same first name and three months older than me. Our names created a bond.
Stories about my grandmother and godmother and the stories of their names.
How their names and personalities influenced me.
Nicknames that I grew up with and have now.
Your name doesn’t have to define you but it can have an influence on who you are. How interesting it is to delve deeper into those stories and decide what path you wish to follow.